Random stupid on the new GI JOE Movie

Ok – I know it’s really hip to say how bad things are, everything sucks (remember how cool this made you feel back in high school?), but there are some things that should never be touched.

And one of those – is the mission of GI Joe – A Real American Hero.

Apparently, this is more than liberal, USA-hating Hollywood can stand, and thus, the producers of the new GI Joe movie have made some slight alterations:

Paramount has confirmed that in the movie, the name G.I. Joe will become an acronym for “Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity” — an international, coed task force charged with defeating bad guys. It will no longer stand for government issued, as in issued by the American government.

That’s awesome, because there really is a world standard for who the “bad guys” are. Hmm . . . do we give it an Eastern angle, and support the status quo of the world superpower in that region, or do we base it on natural resources and thus look out for the interests of the Middle East?

I know . . . we can all have a vote and then decide on what’s best – oh, wait . . . most of the world’s countries don’t believe in silly concepts like “God-given rights,” “freewill,” and freedom to worship and express yourself.

No – they’re too busy dragging political dissidents off to gulags, harvesting their organs, or chopping the arms off of their neighboring tribes.

Oh, wait . . . that’s right – we’re supposed to be the “bad guys” now. Bringing all that awful foreign aid to all of the good countries of the world, selfishly being first to provide medical support and supplies in times of disasters, and adopting unwanted children from other countries that just throw them away if they are unlucky enough to be born female instead of male.

The word is that in the current political climate, they’re afraid that a heroic U.S. soldier won’t fly.

I first saw this on AintItCool.com, but here’s the full article on Fox.

Thanks, Hollywood . . . but didn’t you already made this movie?